Trump l’Oeil

31 January 2012

The financial world holds its breath today, awaiting news of whether or not there with be a deal on 350 Billion Euros worth of Greek Debt, i.e., how the pain will be shared between Greece, the private and government sovreign debt holders.

To get some insights into how this could play out, I called on The Donald, who is our most prolific defaulter, having walked away from at least a dozen massive mortgage, personal and business loans and still managed to preserve his reputation as the World’s Greatest Living Businessmen.

R: May I call you Donald?

T: I prefer “Your Trumpship”

R: Very well. Can you give some advice to the Government of Greece as they go into the final stages of this negotiation?

T: Final stages, that’s a laugh. As if we aren’t going to see this played out again and again for the rest of 2012 and beyond.

R: But the markets are crying out for a solution and some stability so people can start investing again!

T: Let them cry, I say. My advice to Greece is this: this is not your problem, it is your creditors problem. Tell them what you’re willing to pay them, and if they don’t like it, walk away.

R: You think that would work?

T: It worked for me. It worked for Argentina. People have short memories. And they’re always anxious not to be left out of the next deal. Especially the next Trump deal.

R: Let’s talk about that. Why is it people keep investing in you and banks keep lending you money when, time after time, they take huge loses, while you come out whole?

T: That’s how capitalism works. There are winners and losers. Trump is always the winner, and the Banks that lend to me are the losers. That’s why they call it “Risk Capital”.

R: I thought the equity was the risk capital?

T: Well, yes, my investors equity is the risk capital.

R: Do think this same strategy could work for the U.S. in cutting our deficit?

T: (Smiling) I guess we’re going to find out, aren’t we?

Rupert Scofield


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